What to do with the blog…

…so… everything I do seems to have a lifespan of about 1 month before I begin efforts to try and erase it from existence. This is mainly because I look back at the things I do and cannot help but feel revolted at myself for creating things inevitably defined by stupidity, arrogance and pomposity and therefore out of shame feel the need to pursue their erasure.

With this blog – long abandond but not deleted I am trying something else. I am making a return to this blog in order to carry out more inevitably revolting and stupid things. Instead of deleting the past content that I feel is horrible I am writing this post. Instead of deleting the horribleness I am simply declaring all before was shit and should be destroyed, but will not be. This will allow me to continue the blog whilst somewhat statisfying my shame.

By branding the material as such perhaps I will hopefully be able to continue doing this blogging thing – for what purpose I don’t know. Perhaps I have some desire to express things which works against my self-loathing. Perhaps it is all a masochistic psychological operation – I will keep the material and post new material because I know that I can use it to attack myself in the future – and that this is something that I enjoy…

Anyhoo, i guess the point is that I will not be deleting this blog and will endevour to post this to it in the future… and I will inevitable be revolted at myself for it. (is this what is meant by contradictions in capitalism? or am I being stupid? …I think I am being stupid.)


About barkingcoins
This author is just another fucking dickhead.

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